Archive - Sep 26, 2009

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Movie Review: Pandorum ( *1/2)

pandorum review

This screecher of a creature feature is a reacher. And its reach exceeds its grasp. By plenty.

Pandorum is a science fiction horror thriller set in the year 2174. All that’s left on our ravaged Earth has been placed in the space probe Elysium, which is headed for the distant Tanis, an Earth-like planet where life can perhaps be maintained, given that there’s at least oxygen, water, and plant life.

Dennis Quaid and Ben Foster play Lt. Payton and Corporal Bower, respectively, astronauts who wake up from their cryogenic sleep tanks in a hyper-sleep chamber aboard the ship, which has apparently been abandoned.

Apparently.

So they’re drifting through space, it’s pitch black (recalling the Vin Diesel vehicle, Pitch Black), and neither Payton nor Bower can remember a thing: not who they are or why they’re here or where everybody else is.

They begin to piece the puzzle together and figure out what the heck’s going on: their mission is to colonize Tanis, but they’ve veered off course. They also begin to feel an overwhelming paranoia, a variation of what might be called stir craziness or space madness, the condition that lends the film its title.

There’s only one way to the spacecraft’s control room, a dark, narrow airshaft, which Bower crawls through in the hopes of eventually getting the ship back on course. Payton remains behind so he can guide him on a radio transmitter.

What they come to learn is that they are not exactly alone. Not only are there other crew members aboard, but the ship is overrun with flesh-eating mutants that are imposingly fast, strong, and loud. And hungry. Oh, and they know kung fu (a rather silly concept that renders the film in one unforgettably strange scene Kung Fu Pandorum).

Payton and Bower also learn that it’s not only their survival that’s threatened, but that of the human race. If they can’t get the wayward ship back on course, the species is doomed.

German director Christian Alvart (Antibodies, Case 39) — making his English-language debut by working from a muddled and confusing story he co-wrote with the screenwriter, Travis Milloy — owes an obvious debt to Ridley Scott’s classic chiller, Alien, the memory of which makes his pale imitation of a classic seem even worse.

The makers and shapers of Pandorum apparently also think of this as a film of ideas. Hmmm. Well, if so, they’re half-baked at best.

The mild feelings of dread and claustrophobia generated by the early reels are, as so often happens in supposedly scary thrillers, just about completely squandered once what’s to be feared is rendered explicit. The anticipation we feel early on is much more gratifying then the eventual payoff that we resent the movie for leading us on. The result: it flat-out loses us.

And no amount of atmospheric low-key lighting, jittery camerawork, or rapid-fire editing can bring us back. All that can do is give us a collective headache and make us feel we’re dining in a restaurant the staff of which doesn’t want us to see what we’re about to consume.

Perhaps more to the point, the monsters on display aren’t nearly as creepy or terrifying as they’re intended to be anyway.

Pandorum is a derivative and barely disquieting doomsday chiller. But as annoyingly fragmented cannibalistic-zombies-in-space chillers go, it’s still a mess.

Bill Wine – Celebrity News Service Movie Critic/ AHN

108 minutes

In theaters September 25, 2009

Rating: R, Science fiction thriller

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Conan O’Brien injured on set of Tonight Show

conan obrien injured
Tonight Show host Conan O’Brien was injured on the set of his show Friday and was taken to hospital to undergo tests.

According to the network, O’Brien hit his head while he was attempting to do a stunt. It was determined by first responders on the scene that the head injury was more than a bump and O’Brien was rushed to a nearby hospital for treatment.

O”Brien, who some online have claims is dead, is by all accounts is fine and said in a statement that “Last thing I remember I was enjoying the play with Mrs. Lincoln and the next thing I knew I was in bed being served cookies and juice.”

As filming for the show hadn’t been completed, NBC re-run an old show instead.

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Movie Review: Surrogates ( *** )

surrogates review

The science fiction thriller, Surrogates, is He, Robot to I, Robot, Majority Report to Minority Report, Robopop to Robocop.

So, yes, it reminds you of lots of other movies. But it also establishes itself as a thoughtful and intriguing escapist entertainment.

The title refers to humanoid remote control vehicles that act as proxies for futuristic humans, who routinely employ them to avoid having to be in the presence of, or interact with, other humans.

Based on a graphic novel, Surrogates is set in the near future in a world in which humans live their lives remotely, staying in isolation and communicating only through their mind-controlled “surries,” surrogate robots, who, as physically perfect mechanical representations of themselves, are not only more fit but slightly if not largely more presentable-looking versions of them and who assume their life roles. Of course, customers also have the option of creating surrogates who look nothing like them, which lots of folks do.

It’s been a wildly successful and profitable experiment, and it’s led to a contemporary society that is relatively free of crime, fear, discrimination, disease, and pain. People can now experience life vicariously in the comfort and safety of their own homes.

Does anyone object? Sure, what are referred to as “dreads” or “meatbags,” humans who reject the surrogate system and live instead on their own reservation, presided over by the fanatical Prophet, played by Ving Rhames.

But they’re in the decided minority. To everyone else this is a utopia.

Until now, that is, because everything’s about to change.

Bruce Willis stars as Harvey Greer, a severely withdrawn FBI agent who is forced to leave his home for the first time in years. It’s a home he shares with his troubled and estranged wife, played by Rosamund Pike, who remains emotionally devastated by the loss of their young son several years ago.

Greer abandons his own surrogate while he, with the help of his partner, played by Radha Mitchell, investigates several murders — the first homicides in a very long time — including that of the college-student son of the reclusive genius, played by James Cromwell, who invented the high-tech surrogates.

What Greer discovers along the way indicates that there is a conspiracy behind the curtain of this surrogate culture, in which it’s not always easy to tell the difference between a human and his or her surrogate.

Director Jonathan Mostow (Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines, U-571, Breakdown) works from a sci-fi screenplay by John Brancato and Michael Ferris that offers itself as much more of a murder mystery than an action flick. And his handling of the stunts and special effects along the way is first-rate.

The writers don’t seem terribly interested in the strong satirical possiblities suggested by the central conceit, but the narrative does already have a semi-satirical underpinning that still gets the job done. The conspiracy thrust of the plot is perhaps overfamiliar, but the themes of vanity and technological detachment register strongly and the marital relationship between Willis and Pike ends up being strongly and surprisingly affecting.

Willis gets to play what is in essence two roles, reluctant hero Greer and his twenty-years-younger, sandy-haired upgrade of a surrogate. He remains a thoroughly viable leading man.

Surrogates, adapted from a 2006 graphic novel, belongs to the trend of movies based on comic books that do not involve larger-than-life superheroes. It’s a bracing combination of wish fulfillment and social commentary about a society enamored of the importance of appearance, an aspect of the film that isn’t science, fiction, or science fiction.

As for the ending, it may be a trifle too pat, but it’s quite satisfying anyway.

Surrogates is one savvy sci-fi saga. Having seen it as your surrogate, I’m now recommending it for your in-person perusal.

Bill Wine – Celebrity News Service Movie Critic/ AHN

90 minutes

In theaters September 25, 2009

Rating: PG-13, Science fiction thriller

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